Venture “asking for help”! When someone asks us how we are, our answer is usually “good”, regardless of how we’re really feeling.

When we move around in society as humans and regularly meet other people, we are often asked: “So, how are you?”. In most cultures, it is considered polite to assert our well-being rather than burden others with our worries and problems. Thoughts such as “Nobody takes me seriously anyway”, “I’m not supposed to unload all my stress here” or “This person must have only asked out of politeness and isn’t really interested in how I’m doing” are occuring. But what would happen if we were honest? If we opened up and asked for the help and support we need right now?
Those thoughts that appear when we are asked such questions and make us restrain from honest answers are completely understandable – after all, we live in a meritocracy in which we are expected to function! Some of us have also been taught from an early age that we shouldn’t overwhelm other people with our worries – we don’t want to unintentionally impose ourselves on someone. It can also be difficult to decide which people you actually want to open up to and which you should consciously respond to with “Thanks I’m fine, how about you?” so that you don’t have to delve any further into the depths of your own well-being and instead redirect the focus back to the other person.
These patterns of thought and behavior can protect us from disappointment and rejection, but they can also make us feel incredibly lonely. They leave us with the feeling that we cannot confide in anyone and are not allowed to ask for help; we learn that we always have to be strong on our own.
Venture “asking for help”: how would your life possibly change if you dared to tell well selected people about your true feelings and well-being? When was the last time you told someone how you really felt and asked for help? What response did you get? Would you like to learn how to have authentic conversations and recognize who might be suitable confidants?
Let’s talk about it in a free initial session!
#culture #honesty #therapy #weekend
