About your innermost desires! A critical look at “What do you want to be when you grow up?” and “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?”.

“If you don’t know exactly what you want, you will live according to the desires of others.”
From “What do you want to be when you grow up?” to “Where do you see yourself in 5 years?” – we are regularly confronted with the question of what we want and what we wish for. Our desires are formed as we grow up, usually change a few times over the course of our lives and solidify at some point. When we finally know what we REALLY want, we have ‘found ourselves’ – or at least that’s what they say.
But what if our desires are not our own desires at all?
It’s extremely important to analyse whether my desires are actually my own or whether they are, in fact, unconsciously adopted social conventions. Society dictates quite strictly what we’re allowed to desire and which desires are ‘normal’.
For example: if you are single, the question is: ‘Why don’t you have a partner?’, if you are in a relationship, the question is: ‘So, when are you guys getting married?’, if you are married, the question is: ‘So, when’s the first child coming?’, 3 weeks after birth, the next question is already lurking: ‘So, when’s the second child coming?’. We are surprisingly rarely asked about a third child, nor when we will finally get divorced or why we decided to be in a relationship in the first place.
These are our traditional social ‘norms’. Live up to them if you feel comfortable with them! But: don’t let yourself be fooled by what we’re told is ‘normal’; think about what YOU actually want. Create your own standards and guidelines and follow your own personal path through life.
About your innermost desires! How’s your process of self-discovery and creating clarity regarding your innermost desires going? Would you like to get support in separating your own desires from those of others?
Let’s talk about it in a free initial session!
#norms #society #desires
